Evan was a great team player, you know? He always knew how to... he always... I’m sorry. Let me start again. Evan was a great team player, you know? He always knew how to brighten your day with a kind word or glance. He was just great at making you smile. He was the best friend a guy could have, and the best lover a person could wish for. Let us all take a minute to remember him. To remember the good times. I’m gonna miss ya, buddy. We’re all gonna miss ya.
Miranda Van Iderstine
Miranda is thrilled to be starring in Occam’s Razor this year and would just love love love it if you came out and supported her! ;) You may recognize Miranda from some of her past roles, including Inès Serrano in Sartre’s No Exit, Mrs. Bœuf in Ionesco’s Rhinoceros, and Martha in Albee’s Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? Miranda would like to thank her parents, Bill and Melinda, for all the support they’ve given her. Thanks guyyyyys! ;) <3
Morgan has eyes like the rose bloomed nigh the dawn of time. She moves, gracefully, as if she were a dove in flight, swooping down to catch the careless currents above a sea of silent stillness. She waits. She wonders. She worries. She dances. All in the time it takes a new mother to bestow the love of generations upon her child; be free, for what else shall fulfill us?
Hanna can dance the Tango, if you know what she means. She's ready to step to the beat, understand? Syncopated, half-time- you name it, she's game, see? Waltz, Freestyle, and Latin Jazz all are okay with Hanna, if you catch her drift. She's up for some “dancing” tonight, and she is competent in multiple “styles” of rhythmic “pattern”, capeesh? She'll be waiting.
Dan is rich. He's got so much money that his yacht is also fairly affluent. Heir to the Scotch® Tape fortune, Dan “$$$” Lastres IV is absolutely loaded with cash money. He doesn't even know what to do with it all. Do you want some money? Go to Dan, he has a TON of it. It's ridiculous and a tad upsetting how much money this one guy has. It's... it's quite a lot.
Rubin doesn't want to make a scene here, he just needs you to sit down and lower your voice. He knows you've had a long day, and this situation must be extremely frustrating. He understands why you want to yell and throw ketchup packets, but he assures you that it won't make you feel any better. It will just make a mess. So, please, for Rubin, put down the spatula and let's have a talk, hm?
Say that name three times. Elijah Wolter, Elijah Wolter, Elijah Wolter. Remember that name, because one day this guy is gonna be real famous, and you'll want to tell your friends you knew him. He's going places, definitely, and when he gets places those places are going to be overflowing with diamonds. Or whatever famous people have. It's diamonds, right? He's pretty sure it's diamonds.
You can take the girl out of North Cambrook, Rhode Island, but you can't take North Cambrook, Rhode Island out of Lucy Johnson. Lucy embodies everything that makes North Cambrook, Rhode Island such a great place to live and fish; from her eyes that are murky blue like the waters of Lake Faltershed, to her smile which is wide like the Masonridge forest, to her lovely demeanor reminiscent of North Cambrook, Rhode Island's first mayor, Mayor Greeney, Lucy Johnson is the quintessential North Cambrook, Rhode Island native.
Omar Elmasry is the first, and last, all-American bluesman. You haven't known true sorrow until you've heard This One's On Me. You haven't felt pure joy until you've listened to Walkin' On The Backroad. Until you've really processed The Wait's What's Weightin', you haven't truly made love through music. Omar has a heart of soul and a soul of pain, and the magic of his songs has realized the hopes and dreams of a generation.
The daughter of a working class steel manufacturer and a Delaware State Senator, Wegsman knows what it means to be an average American. She has devoted her life to understanding the struggles of ordinary people, including having to ride the bus sometimes. Wegsman is excited to join Occam's Razor this year and, with your help at the polls, lead it. Thank you, and God bless us, everyone.
Sophistication. Elegance. Style. These are the words that define Uduak Wilson. Composure. Charm. Suave. These are more words. When you think of poise quintessencié, think of Uduak. When you think of Uduak, don't think of Uduak. Your trillions of synapses can merely glimpse the grace and glamour gushing from this gallant gentleman. It is an insult. This very passage has failed to do justice. You apologize. He accepts.
Patrick Doyle (Manager)
Born and educated at the Plouff School for Gifted Money, Patrick Doyle has been churning out success after success since graduating with hors d'oeuvre. Responsible for overnight sensations The Mousers and Girlfriends of The Devil, Patrick is as experienced a manager as Occam's Razor could afford. He looks forward to procuring better contracts for the group, ideally one that includes a stipend for brie.
Occam’s Razor™ is the University of Chicago's independent™ improv troupe™. We are comprised of a handful of UChicago students trying desperately to make some new friends. We practice twice per week and perform three free shows per quarter. New members are cast each fall and all members perform for as long as they remain in the group. We are all virgins. All of us. Not once have any one of us performed the sacred and revered act of intercourse. This is not a requirement, merely a coincidence. Please be kind.
Occam's Razor performs in the FXK Theater on the 3rd floor of the University of Chicago's Reynolds Club. It is our home, it is our bed, it is our grave. There we live, there we love, and there we die. Please keep it clean, chaste, and warm.
Here at Occam's Razor, we believe that comedy is the only true way to unlock the secrets of OhMorris's power. Who is OhMorris, you ask? Why, we are! We have fused to become Him, thank you! But we must still appease His lust for humor and fresh fruit, so we take to the stage in tribute to His everlasting spirit.